Thanksgiving!

This week is my very favorite holiday... Thanksgiving! And we get to celebrate a birthday too! Miss Delilah is turning 4! It was never hard for me to see Sarah getting big, and it hasn't been difficult for me to watch Simon and Stephen grow, but that little Delilah makes me cry every time she makes a mile stone! We have some fun things planned for her birthday. A tradition we have for birthdays is that the special person gets to pick any restaurant they want. Lilah picked CiCi's, an all you can eat pizza buffet. We are glad she picked that... its SUPER cheap. (We can all eat there for less than $20.00) and of course SUPER yummy! And of course I will make cupcakes. Delilah is totally into Care Bears... so I am going to make her some colorful Care Bear Cupcakes!

Thanksgiving this year has proven to be a little bit of a disappointment. I love cooking, and the more people I can feed the better! But since we are new here, it will just be the McClure crew. We really prayed and prayed for something to come out of the woodwork, since our own efforts seemed to be fruitless, but the answer God gave us was "Nope. Its just you guys this year." So, we have a little tiny feast planned, and this year all the girls of the house are going to be cooking. Sarah created her own type of coffee cake, and she will be making that this year. Delilah is going to make our traditional "Cranberry Fluff." Instead of a turkey we are going to make Rosemary Chicken... it will be quiet and fun. For school, instead of turkey crafts, we are doing porcupine crafts! We are learning about Gratefulness... and part of the lessons are "Gratefulness in Nature." We learned all about the humble porcupine, and how, even though it doesn't have much going for it, it still stands up and sings... "YUM-O-EE-UM!!" So we are practicing being thankful like the porcupine (Choosing to be happy with the things that we have.) and I have four little porcupines running around my house singing at the top of their lungs!

I suppose a natural segue would be to move on to the things that I am thankful for... but I'm not going to lie to you. I have to think really hard about what I have to be happy about. (I count my children and sweet, selfless husband every day... what I am referring to is my life circumstances.) Its been just about a year since we made the choice to pack up and leave our Comfortable California. In mid February we will have been in Beautiful Colorado for a year! It started out as an adventure, and we were all so optimistic about the future. We were going to conquer this place in Jesus' name and the powers of evil would cower in fear! Ha! Here is what I learned.

"In his heart a man plans his course, but the Lord determines his steps." (Proverbs 16:9) And I am so glad that even though we came here with a plan, the Lord's hand has been directing our lives, without fail. Even now, despite the fact that we have come through incredible difficulty, and experienced some very deep, very private, indescribable pain, I know that we have taken the exact steps that the Sovereign has called us to. Even having that knowledge, it is hard to be thankful when it seems that you have been broken down to nothing. There is so much that we have been through I think it would take too much time to share... but the short story is that we gave ourselves to Jesus, we committed our family and ourselves to the work of the Lord, and nothing he could ask would ever be too much for us to give. There is no other reason at all why we would continue on this journey except for the sake of the call. And in order to fulfill Savior's plan for our lives here is Colorado, it was necessary for him to burn away all the filth, and strip us down to nothing. Why? Because now we can SHINE!

We were here all this time, ready to do everything he asked of us, and all this time we have been waiting! And all this time, while I was feeling like a failure for not acting, He was working in the hearts of these wonderful people that live around us. One day, some very, very polite little boys knocked on our door and said "Umm... our friend's mom lives upstairs and she said you might have a bike pump we can use?" and the next week those same little boys came, and brought a friend... and then the next time it was some more sweeties... And then do you know what happened? We were called. The Lord spoke. (But I'm not sharing yet! :-b) We could really use your prayers as the next chapter in our life here begins.

So, to end my little post, another Proverb, from 14:26: "He who fears the Lord has a secure fortress, and for his children it will be a refuge." This thanksgiving we will definitely not be naming such things as toys and financial gain on our thanksgiving tree... we have learned a valuable lesson, and we are thankful for gaining a fortress, a refuge... and we can now consider it PURE JOY when we face trials of every kind! Our faith has been tested, we have persevered, and one day we will be mature and complete, not lacking ANYTHING! (James 1:2)

YUM-O-EE-UM!

They are all "sleeping!"

Oh, my. I can't even remember the last time I had a chance to breathe between 6:30 AM and 9:00 PM... Our lives have taken on a certain chaos. After a long time "renting" a hotel room and a summer of unemployment, and finding a 3 bedroom apartment far beyond what our budget can afford Peter had to find a second job. He is now a special education aid during the day, and a chik-file employee by night. The goal is for him to move into management in fast food and quit his job as a para but for now we are running, running, running. (And our budget is still stretched TIGHT!) We continue to wait, like clay waiting for the artist to complete the work, for the Lord to move us in a specific direction. We came to Beautiful Colorado with our plan, knowing that God may change us. And change he did. We are simply waiting, watching, and learning.

Sarah has also started Kindergarten! I am incredibly blessed to be able to take on her education myself. (Though for two weeks since we've started I've questioned my sanity to take on such a monumental task!) I am amazed at how much she already knows, and how much she has soaked up since I started teaching her! (She can recognize the spelling of numbers 1-4, and match them to the numbers... is doing basic addition and subtraction with both groups of objects and the numbers, has learned about extreme weather conditions and knows about how thunder and lightning is "made." She also uses words like "mischief" and "meteorologist.") It has been exhausting and super fun!

Delilah and Simon are struggling with the change, but I think that it will ultimately result in a positive change... Lilah is showing more responsibility, trying to help with her little brothers. I tell her that she is the oldest one when Sarah is doing school, so she needs to be responsible and help them to follow the rules. (If you know Delilah, you know that she is constantly looking for trouble, and fun, fun, fun. Consequences don't seem to spur her toward behaving...) She does try to help, and has begun to wash the breakfast dishes and comb her own hair in the morning. Simon is typical "just go with it" Simon...

Stephen points at things that he wants, says "all done" in both words and baby sign. He also says "Mama" "Ow!" and "Lilah." He growls like a lion, and is going to start walking very, very soon! I am taking him off of his bottle (he gets a big boy cup once a day.)

So now, its off to the races once again!

In the beginning...

Okay. So. Someone told me just the other day "I realized I don't actually know what it is exactly you're doing..." and I realized that she's probably not the only one. I will elaborate. (Do I actually know what we are doing?) Hopefully without boring you all. Its not such an exciting story...

To begin with, we are very non-traditional in our beliefs. We believe in reaching people on their level. Instead of expecting them to come to us, we will go to them. On the street corners, in the parks, in their homes. And in our experience we've seen that people respond much better when a relationship is established BEFORE sharing the gospel. They also respond better when they are invited into our home. Where we (people) live is very personal, and when someone comes into the place that is very private, it establishes a bond, and sends the message that they are important, and that they are special in some way...

We also feel the beating hearts of the more crime infested areas. I don't know if we are supposed to be living there, but we love the people very, very much in those areas. Jesus didn't come to save the righteous. He came for the lost, and we want to be living among the lost... among the dirty and the wretched. Of course, all people who do not know Christ are in need of His saving blood... but sometimes it seems that the people who are marked as throw-aways are ignored, and feared. Sometimes the need for Christians to be living in these places is greater, because nobody is willing to do so. We are willing.

Sometime last year we signed a lease in Marin City. It was a horrendously looooong process, and we began renting an apartment (at a low-income price, and then that price was discounted) for $1400.00 a month. The lease was for 9 months, and for 5 months we wondered what we were going to do when our lease was over and the price went up more. (Most of you know that Peter doesn't make much money. We were stretched at 1400.00 as it was.) Once we had 4 months left I said "What are we doing?!?!" and then we began to brain-storm.

Ever since I've known Peter he's wanted to move out of California, so of course this was an option. Except, Peter is still in school, and there was absolutely no way I just spent 3 years of my life living the seminary experience for nothing. We have also moved at least once a year, for the whole time we've been married. (7 years) I wasn't excited to move again, and I knew that another in-state move would only result in something temporary and more long term goals put on hold for "just one more move." We want to be somewhere long enough to establish relationships with people. So, we decided that we were going to jump in and GO! Our plan was to get here, (hopefully with a job waiting for Peter) and find a place to rent for a year while we researched the house buying process... then after a year to buy a home. We (I) researched the cost of living in each of the states that have campuses for Golden Gate, and also demographics, and statistics, and crime rates... so on and so forth. We narrowed it down to 2 states, and then emailed our "contacts." (I say contacts because it makes me feel important.) We were told to just come on over to Colorado, because workers are always needed.

Denver was where we wanted to be. It is culturally similar to California (Though there are some big differences too!) And there is a lot of crime and spiritual upheaval.

Once we decided that Denver Colorado was the place for us, we started applying for jobs. (Since we knew we were moving I had already begun packing before we were settled on a place to move to.) After a frustrating while, and no job interviews or responses I asked if we would go even if there was nothing. Our answer was "yes." We trusted that everything would be taken care of, in God's time. Not our own.

Two days before we left we got a phone call from some of our friends. Apparently there was a family in Greeley that was trying to rent their home. We needed a house, so we decided that we would go to Greeley. There were no job leads in the Denver area, so it was not an issue to move the search a bit more North. The day we arrived in Colorado Peter got a phone call from a school district near Denver. They wanted to interview him. So, he went. We didn't know that it was so far away from Greeley. As it turned out, the hiring process happened faster than it took for us to sign the lease on the house in Greeley (plus, Greeley=Podunk Colorado) so we are living in a hotel in Aurora, closer to where Peter works!

So, skipping a bunch of not so important details... we are here, living in a hotel room. We recently put a bid in on a really large house. There was a lot of potential in it, but our bid was turned down. Tomorrow we will go look at some town houses. They are cheaper, and have more square footage than the houses in our price range. We are planning to choose one and put in a bid. Hopefully we will get out of here soon! We are anxious to start ministry, and to start moving closer to our other goals!

Peter has 1 class left before he gets his degree. We are thinking about sending him back (Noooooooo!!!!!) to get a teaching credential. He cannot move up in the pay scale as an aid, and because of the size of our family, and because of the nature of our ministery we need more money! We will start homeschooling Sarah next school year. We will also begin to really, really advertise and establish our baking business. (This means getting permits to work out of our kitchen, or find a kitchen to use. I heard a rumor that some places rent them.) We also want to pay off all of our debt, (and stay out!) except for the house loan. We are also going to research and pray really, really hard about foster parenting, and possibly adopting. Even though all of this seems like a lot, I believe that the life we are living, and have been living, has prepared us for all of this. We can do all things through Christ! And this is all stuff that will help us to build onto the Lord's Kingdom! We will take one thing at a time... these are things that will take awhile! But please be praying for us to have wisdom, and to make good choices that will reflect our beliefs!

Go For It!

Yesterday we were feeling extra cooped up. It was a beautiful day to be out and doing something, so we got out for the afternoon and checked out the local Goodwill Store. We've driven past it several times and every time we do I say "That place is HUGE!" Its seriously ginormous! When we walked in it wasn't organized at all. Everything was thrown into large bins, piled to overflowing. The bins were semi orderly (As in, piles of clothing with more piles of clothing, and then everything else piled into other bins.) Toys were mixed up with toasters, and bread machines, and other random "trash." A lot of it was broken or had missing parts. The snob in me immediately thought "This is garbage and I want to leave! Forget touching it! Its dirty and GROSS!" But we did end up staying and after a few minutes (and I realized that they charged .99 a pound!) I started digging. I found some cute shirts for the kids, and Peter found some toys... and then, they began to take some of the bins away. We stood back and watched. Everyone stopped digging and stepped back. A few of them went to the bathroom, some of them wiped the sweat off of their brows... some of them even wore gloves... most of them mismatched. (Perhaps single gloves that they had found on days past at this particular store?) then they all lined up with the tips of their toes touching the tape used to line the bins up evenly. Once the bins were cleared out of the way, they brought new bins out. People began to scan the new loot... (Peter did too! We bought a play mat for Stephen, and a Bumbo! Do you know how much those cost at Target? ) and moved around to the place they most wanted to be. Tension in the air rose (You think I'm being funny...) and then, like a gunshot, someone shouted "GO FOR IT!" And there was commotion. People were throwing stuff around, they were racing around the bins... they were calling out to everyone which parts they needed... people were finding stuff for others and tossing it to them... it was one of the most incredible experiences of my life. A lady found a whole dress up set for Lilah and gave it to her... lacy gloves and a flower hat, and a feather boa... to match the purse I had found for her earlier. In this store people came together, and looked out for eachother. And I also realized that some of these people probably buy all of their things here. What I have taken for granted... new shoes, new pants... a new toy for my children fresh from the packaging... some people are unable to provide. It was a refreshing and an eye opening experience! Here are a couple of pictures of the kids showing off their new stuff!

We are here.

Today was an especially hard day. There was nothing exceptional that made it difficult... the morning happened just like usual. But then, THE PANCAKES. Yesterday we went grocery shopping. And I mean we really, really went grocery shopping. I had to buy everything. Meat, fruits, vegetables. (Can I just talk about the fruits and veggies here? They are terrible. I paid almost $2 for a pound of broccoli that was all wilty and sad looking... I never knew how great California produce was. Not to mention the freaking expensive sushi here.) So, anyways... I bought some gluten free pancake mix just for fun. Here in the hotel we are living at there is a "kitchen" with "pots and pans." Whatever. There's a stove. Microwave. And some ghetto melted plastic cooking spoons and some lame cookware. (Everyday is a challenge and a lesson in being thankful for my daily provisions... I'm a work in progress, what can I say?) It was a fiasco. Smoke, burnt pancakes, and Sarah saying "Daddy, does mommy even know how to cook pancakes?" It was because they were gluten free, and called for a NON-STICK skillet. In the end it was fine, but it just really, really annoyed me that something like yummy pancakes were so difficult to pull off. Next time I'm going to Denny's.

And, the kids were so whiny... we are still getting over a cold/flu thing... parenting is a challenge here in such a small, confined space. Its easy to get caught up in what we don't have... I constantly have to check my attitude, and then remind my babies about others. Lord, help me to not turn myself inward! Less of me... less of me!

We have found that renting a place out here is proving to be more difficult than we anticipated. I might be paranoid, but once folks hear that we have 4... count them 4! Small Ones they look down their noses at us. I've observed that there are actually a lot of large families out here in beautiful Colorado, but they tend to be in the lower income bracket, and renters don't really want to mess around with that. So, we are currently shopping for a house to buy. We have been talking about this for a long time, and planned to buy a house in the next year or so... our plans are just being accelerated, and we are excited that the Lord has blessed us with this opportunity NOW! This means that all of our other long-term goals are also going to happen faster than we planned. The low-income community is near Colfax, (the main street, that goes through Denver) so we are going to be looking in that area. We have driven through it several times, and the souls there are crying out. We are excited, excited, excited to meet them.

It snowed last night, while we were sleeping. I think that it has snowed about 3 or 4 times since we've been here. It is amazing... incredible... indescribable. I've seen snow before, but these times since moving here I am reminded, every time, of the gift of salvation. The turmoil of the clouds, the ugliness of the dead grass, the bone-chilling cold that permeates everything is wiped away... it becomes flawless and pure. There is beauty, and it is made new. And it all happens while I am sleeping.

This is my hope for the community that we are here to love. That they would know the peace, and the pure love of The Creator. The One who washes the earth clean with the rain. The One who covers the earth with snow. The One who makes the sun rise on a desolate world. The One who is responsible for the mountains, the stars, the ocean... He loves them! He loves THEM!

Are we there yet?!?

It has been ONE. LONG. WEEK. We began last week finishing up packing and cleaning... and on the Tuesday before we moved we had no place to go to, and no job. Then on Wednesday, while taking the car to the shop for an emergency fix Peter got a phone call from our good friend asking "Do you have a house yet?" As it turns out, someone from Greeley, Colorado had moved to Oakland and was having trouble renting his house. After a phone call or two we made arrangements for us to fill out the paperwork as soon as we got to the area. We left on Thursday hopefull and in good spirits. (But, still no job! Eeeek!)

We didn't do much stopping once we hit the road, we were going! At one point, on our first day, we stopped at Wal-Mart to get a roof top carrier for our car. (We were like the McSardine family riding along with all our stuff on our laps! Ha!) Then while Peter put it up and packed it up I put all of our lunch food in a cart. (Bread, crackers, lunch meat... etc.) While I was wheeling it across the parking lot the sudden feeling of being homeless and pushing our things along to nowhere in particular hit me... And Sarah also began to comlain about where she was eating, and how she was eating, and what she was eating, and how much she had... on and on and on! It was awful! Then I noticed a homeless man sitting on the corner of the street, holding a sign, that said "Homeless. Please Help." I was struck by the simple desperation of his cry... and turned to my Young Ones and pointed him out. I explained to them that even though we might not like what we have, we still have. The man on the corner didn't have any food or bed to look forward to, and that he didn't know when he would have anything like string cheese or buttery crackers. I then asked if they thought that since we had extra we might make him a lunch and take it to him? Of course they were excited to share, and I have not heard any more complaints (of that magnitude) since then.

I have been awed and humbled by the beauty of the landscape surrounding us in every moment of this drive. Who could I possibly be, that the Creator would make something as marvelous as Earth... mountains, desert, mesas, ocean... and still he loves ME! He became the atoning sacrifice so I wouldn't have to die. I must really be something special to him... Every day has been a new lesson in life for me. I have really been feeling the gentle (and sometimes painful!) chipping away of flesh... I am being refined. This move has challenged me to the core, and I am grateful to the Lord for pushing me onward, and for shaping my heart... for preparing me for His Great Purpose!

Today I think that Peter and I were both really struggling with being here, and still being nowhere. We took a day off from the road and rested. We visited The Garden of the Gods (another magnificent testimony to the awesomeness of our Savior) But at one point right after nap we were both really wrestling with ourselves... I was reminding myself that the Lord has gone before us, and that he has a plan for work and home... and then Peter's phone rang. It was a school in Aurora calling to schedule an interview! I almost choked, and almost cried, and almost laughed at the absurdity of it all... (Though it is an hour away from where we want to live...) Even though we know that Peter might be one of many interviewing for this job, it reminded us that everything will come to pass. I surrendered myself to Christ once again today...

2 Week Countdown!

Time is moving along at a frantic pace these days! We have a timeline of events that are happening to mark our move. Our furniture is being taken apart and wrapped in plastic to help it last through "just one more move." (Lets face it, our stuff is cheap. What can we expect when we bought it all at IKEA?) (Plus, this is more than likely NOT our last move.) All of our furniture has been sold, except the couches. We will probably end up taking them with us, since they are in fine condition, and it would be pretty wasteful to just toss them in the dumpster. We are living out of suitcases, and I haven't been to the grocery store for stocking up purposes in over 2 months! The kids are doing much better with the idea of leaving, and I think that we are all becoming more excited than dreadful of the unknown.

Some fun facts about Denver, Colorado: There are at least 80 different neighborhoods in Denver, and no two neighborhoods are characterized in the same way. On top of these neighborhoods there are 200 parks in the city. (As of 2006) and the huge city park in 314 acres! It is the 24th most populous city in the USA, is about 70% white, and 30% hispanic. The average age of the Denver population is 33 years old. 10% of families are below the poverty line. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Denver_CO) (There is much, much more info on Denver in this article, if you want to know more about where we are going)
Crime in Denver is high. A person's chance of becoming a victim of either violent crime, or property crime is 1 in 16. However, this is low compared to other cities whose size is similar to Denver. (A person's chance of becoming a victim of violent crime is 1 in 123, and property crime is 1 in 16) (according to this website http://www.neighborhoodscout.com/co/denver/crime/)

We are excited to get to this city and begin to get to know its people... we are still searching for a home, and a job, but we are peaceful and trusting of the Lord's provisions. We hope to find a community that is primarily low income families (and hopefully high crime rates) so that we can reach them with Hope Eternal... and offer them the Life-Giving blood of Christ.

As a final note, I have begun to read to the kiddos from Proverbs every day. I write a few verses down on a paper in kid language, and am making a little book of them. This morning, as I was paraphrasing Proverbs 2: 6 (For the Lord gives wisdom, and from His mouth come knowledge and understanding.) I was reminded of James 1:5. (If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all, without finding fault.) Please pray for us to continue to surrender our lives completely to the Lord, and if any of you are having trouble understanding our move, and our motivation, please ask the Lord to reveal His heart, and our hearts to you. Also pray for the precious souls in Denver, Colorado, to be prepared and ready to recieve The Word in Flesh!

Just some ramblings and updates...

So, the countdown to Colorado has begun. After a valiant search on the part of every single person in this house we found a calendar. (Nobody had ANY in our area) (Mommy was going crazy without a way to track my days.... I was about to start carving tally marks in the wall.) Its Zhu-Zhu pets, the latest craze among the three oldest McClure children. Today is the 9th, (right?) So we're leaving in just a month! So far, all the ducks are in order. Except, um, a place to live and an income. Here I am, FREAKING OUT. Peter is so calm on the outside, (probably not on the inside) and I know that no matter what happens the Lord is in control, but this is just dumb. I feel lame, every moment of the day living in prayer, saying to God "Please give us a job and a place to live." Because logic would dictate that we will not move until this is taken care of. But, like Pastor John preached yesterday "Do you choose this, and do you choose to be all in?" We are choosing this, and we are all in, and we are going! Our hotels are booked, most of our things are packed, we will book a moving company by the end of the week. (Don't even get me started on that fiasco.) And I have directions to all of our stops. We have also bought each of the girls a book about moving to a new place, and have some new toys/car activities to bring along. We also have numerous contacts in Denver so that we've got homies watchin' our backs when we get there. Next will be to download an e-book with all the rest stops along our route, and to make a list of grocery stores and pharmacies in each of our destinations. We are barely bringing anything in our car with us... just about enough clothes to last us about half of our drive and the food we need to get us there. (I'm insisting on stopping at a restaurant in New Mexico though. Can you say "Yum!")

Some things to pray for:

Lilah is having a really, really hard time with moving. So am I. Thankfully I am an adult and understand that my things will be there, but Sweet Delilah is quite upset every time I pack a box...

Organization and clarity. It is super hard for me to think while things are so disorganized. I thought that we were moving this month, so a lot of things that would have been useful are packed, not to mention having no specific place for things that we are still using.

Moving expenses/budget: We have been blessed with a significant amount of money for this move, and are cutting as many corners as we can, but we are having a hard time coming in under-budget, and we would really, really like to have a small cushion for after we get to Colorado.

As a side note: Sarah thinks this is an adventure and fun! She helps us to stay positive, and is really helping her brother and sister see the positive side of all of this. She is such a super helper, and I am so proud of her sunshiny self!